Mourning my son's death

Mon, Sep 9, 2013 at 10:06 AM By: mom

Hi , I lost my son July 12th , 2013 at the age of 31, he leaves five children. He was in a divorce and custody battle,. he was accused of many things , one of being a Satanist because he listened to Korn music.

Well as a tribute to my son and Korn,, because they are his favorite band, I rocked his funeral by playing Korn's songs , " DEAD " as the intro , then " 4 U '" then "Coming Undone", because after the year we have been through with him, we were all there.

Pallbearers and Family wore his Korn shirts , his casket and vault was black with stainless steel. The inside of his vault was all shinny stainless steel ,, his own personal stage to rock.! He is buried a few miles from my home so I go over and play Korn for him.

I regret not having it video taped . Why you ask am I sharing , well I am just trying to cope with losing him ,, people around you move on even though you are still grieving. They can only do so much and we have to deal with it ourselves. So to me this is for him as much as me .

So, you can rock your funeral however you want. Even the older generation friends who came to the funeral , thought it was tastefully done, so I did not offend anyone.

My son always tried to get us to go with him to a concert , and we didn't. I regret that, so parents , listen to what your children are interested in , even if you don't like it , you will find a happy medium somewhere.

My son I love and miss you with all my heart, hope you have peace,, and this was 4 U, MOM

  1. ilovehead1529 avatar

    On Fri, Sep 13, 2013 at 3:46 PM, ilovehead1529 said:

    im so sorry for your loss... it's horrible when a mother looses a child. one of my best friends passed away this summer, justin was only 24. his mother still grieves for him everyday. he was also in a band and loved ridding motorcycles. thank you for sharing your story on here with all of us. it has truly touched my heart. stay strong x0x0x

  2. Emily0927 avatar

    On Fri, Sep 13, 2013 at 11:53 AM, Emily0927 said:

    Im sorry for your loss this also a beautiful thing that you have written Your son no doubt is proud xoxoxo

  3. Xusi avatar

    On Fri, Sep 13, 2013 at 11:27 AM, Xusi said:

    So sorry for your loss ..
    There are no words that I can offer that could ever be of comfort, such grief you must feel. Please take great comfort from his beautiful children, in them there is love that can heal your loss. Wish you peace & comfort my Friend (x)
    Luce xxx

  4. avangardeify avatar

    On Thu, Sep 12, 2013 at 5:13 AM, avangardeify said:

    this is a very touching story. i wish you all the strenght in the world to cope with your pain. i'm very sorry for what happened, it's my biggest fear to lose someone close to heart. :( all the best for you, xxx

  5. faithann avatar

    On Wed, Sep 11, 2013 at 2:05 PM, faithann said:

    Sorry to hear if your need to talk message me any time

  6. hylianux avatar

    On Wed, Sep 11, 2013 at 10:27 AM, hylianux said:

    I'm definitely mandating Korn at my funeral. "I will protect you" and "eaten up inside" will be on the list. Good for you for playing the music that your son had the strongest spiritual attunement to. I'm sorry for your loss, and I too feel lost because my parents and I cannot find a middle ground on music. They don't take the time to understand WHY I listen to Korn, and what I'm getting out of listening. Their minds are shut off. You're a good parent for taking an interest like that, because I sure wish mine would.

  7. Twisted Transistor avatar

    On Mon, Sep 9, 2013 at 6:01 PM, Twisted Transistor said:

    I apologize the is a few grammar errors.

  8. Twisted Transistor avatar

    On Mon, Sep 9, 2013 at 5:59 PM, Twisted Transistor said:

    Today, while at work, I read your blog, I had to quit, my heart thumping out o f my chest, my own loss of recent, choking me, becoming entwined in your loss, your grief, I wanted to run and wail a Cherokee cry.

    I realize there is really nothing anyone can say to lessen the pain, but know, your son is not far away. Though you cannot see or touch him, he is near, and if you listen with your heart, you will hear all of his love around you soft and clear.

    Your an amazing mom to play songs from his favorite band-koRn at his funeral, and everything synchronized with the theme. Thinking about it gives me goose bumps, wow!

    Please know, we Children of the koRn, welcome you to blog anytime-sharing your grief, we are here for you.

    Thank you for sharing, I am confident your son is in a peaceful state, he has you as your mom and he still rocking out to koRn!




  9. sH3LLz avatar

    On Mon, Sep 9, 2013 at 4:13 PM, sH3LLz said:

    so sorry about your son, the funeral though, that was very awesome of you and your family and friends to do, i'm sure he was looking down and smiling. you are an awesome mom for coming on here and sharing this with us, thank you <3

  10. Tammie avatar

    On Mon, Sep 9, 2013 at 11:16 AM, Tammie said:

    I'm so very sincerely sorry for your loss as I am crying for you. I think the boys in the band would be very touched by this blog. May your son rest in peace.

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  1. Mourning my son's death

    Mon, Sep 9, 2013 at 10:06 AM 10 comments