Story written awhile ago...

Tue, Jan 10, 2012 at 10:08 AM By: Sunset_Tahoe

I really don't know why I like the lead singer suu much... He's sexy and he has a nice voice range when he sings or screams. A lot of the times when I hear him scream I feel the pain that he feels when he recorded the song. I feel everything. For some reason in a way it's like he kinda watches over me. It's like he's my only friend especially when I am home alone with only me and my music. Especially when I don't want to be bothered. He comforts me, understands how I feel. Understands what I am going through.  He's the only one here to comfort me. Even when Justin isn't there. He is like protection, an advice giver. Just through his music. Idk how he does it. He's quite mysterious ya never know what he's gonna do... Some of the songs that he has written are about death. He's kinda the reason why I look at a different way other than suicide. He freaking kills people. That's what I enjoy. Not only do I enjoy the way he sings but what he sings. He has a creepy way of saying things. And then add his creepy vocals and you got a kick ass song. More like an album. One of the songs from them: "Holding All These Lies" still bothers me to this day. When I got their last album back in December, it just so happened to be a week and a half before the school shooting back in January. I remember when I first got the album. I enjoyed all the songs. But when I got home four hours after the shooting. I had listened to the whole album before I had gotten to that song. When I had finally started to listen to the song, something seemed very wrong. I had kept on repeating it over and over again that night without ever figuring out what was wrong with it. Days past with grief an loss of what happened along with confusion of the song. Then a month past after the incident. I was still in a haze of the songs meaning but I kind of realized it had something to do with  what happened a month earlier. About three months afterwords, one Tuesday in march I was watching an episode of NCIS: Los Angeles. That episode had something of he same subject as a school shooting and the kid was on drugs. At the end of the episode, grandma and I had a discussion over it and I told her that the kid that shot up the school here was also on drugs. At first I was fine with what I had said. But when I went upstairs to my room I looked at he picture of him and just broke down crying. Then that was when I realized that the song had made some weird connection to what happened. Then I got super pissed off and wanted to break the cd with that song on it in half. I'm glad I didnt do it. I still have problems with that song to this day. But it doesn't affect me as much anymore but i still have my moments of sadness. I wonder how I will be when the one year anniversary comes around... Maybe I don't want to know. I don't want to think to much on that right now. I can't really say that I like the song but I can listen to it every now and then. I kinda like to listen to it in the car with my mom, she likes to make fun of him with his crying like a little bitch... But then again if I think about it hard enough those are his emotions. He can't hold back something that deep, that heavy of a weight of emotions and letting them out in a song or a whole entire album. If I were to be in his place I think that I would never get over myself. I think I would be way more depressed than what I am now. It seems kind of weird to me that he comforts me for the content of most of the songs. A lot of them do make me cry and for good reason. I can feel things that others can't and if I feel the sadness coming from him I tend to start to feel the same way. But I have listened to him enough now that I'm used to those kind of emotions. Even though he songs that he sings are deep and emotional they also sound good with the rest of the band playing the instruments and his beautiful voice. He's good at everything when it comes to song writing and singing the songs that he writes. I enjoy him suu much. I hope someday that I will get a chance to meet him and the band. To thank them all for helping me in tough situations like my own depression issues. I want to somehow reach out now because of all of what they have done and for what I have been through. Thank you suu much guys, you all really know how to do things around here and with the rest of the world... I owe you guys suu much. You just don't know how much you mean to me. No one else really knows at all but myself, thank you! :)

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